50 Ways to Be an Asshole Client

If you're looking to destroy freelancer morale, create unnecessary friction, and make talented people quietly rethink their career, you're in the right place.

Scroll down, check off the things you've done, and see which client trope best matches your working style. The results may be more revealing than you'd like.

Here are 50 proven methods.

1. Say "it's a simple task" and proceed to add endless additions.

2. Ask for a quote before explaining the project. Keep them guessing.

3. Mention your budget only after five meetings. Maximum efficiency.

4. Describe your vision as "you'll know it when you see it."

5. Request a complete redesign after approving everything, then act surprised that additional work costs additional money.

6. Treat deadlines as one-sided obligations.

7. Reply to questions with "use your creativity" and get frustrated when the creativity isn't exactly what you imagined.

8. Introduce three new stakeholders right before launch so they can contribute fresh confusion and reset months of progress.

9. Ask for "just one small change." Twenty-seven times.

10. Disappear for two weeks. Then ask why progress stopped.

11. Send feedback through six different apps and one voice note recorded while driving.

12. Call freelancers "partners." Remind them they're not partners the moment money is discussed.

13. Expect immediate replies at 2 a.m.

14. Negotiate aggressively after work has already started.

15. Compare every quote to someone cheaper you've conveniently never hired.

16. Ask for free samples and then hire someone else to copy them.

17. Make every task urgent.

18. Schedule meetings to discuss future meetings.

19. Change objectives halfway through the project.

20. Assume everyone understands your industry jargon, acronyms, and internal terminology.

21. Demand loyalty from people you're paying late.

22. Request unlimited revisions and then discover new opinions every morning.

23. Tell freelancers exposure is valuable. Strangely, your landlord doesn't accept exposure as payment.

24. Ask why a five-hour task costs more than your hourly wage.

25. Expect senior-level work on a beginner budget.

26. Invite freelancers into internal company drama they never asked to join.

27. Ask for strategic advice. Ignore all of it.

28. Turn every conversation into a negotiation.

29. Ask them to "care more" after spending three weeks making them question their career choices.

30. Pay invoices whenever the mood strikes. If ever.

31. Demand flexibility. Offer none.

32. Insist on daily updates, then repeatedly ask questions that were answered in the updates.

33. Reject every proposed solution without proposing one of your own.

34. Ask for a discount because the project will be "great for their portfolio."

35. Tell freelancers you could do it yourself if you had the time.

36. Hire an expert and then spend the entire project explaining their profession to them.

37. Treat contractors like employees, except when employee benefits enter the conversation.

38. Assume friendship equals discounted work forever.

39. Say "this should only take an hour" and then spend forty-five minutes explaining your life story.

40. Request work outside the agreed scope. Act surprised when there's a charge.

41. Refuse to make decisions. Complain that the project is moving too slowly.

42. Leave a bad review because you're having a bad week.

43. File a complaint with the marketplace because you regret your purchase, not because anything actually went wrong.

44. Push someone until they finally lose their patience, then frame it as a professionalism issue.

45. Give contradictory feedback back-to-back and expect everyone else to reconcile it.

46. Ask for premium quality at bargain-bin pricing.

47. Blame freelancers for your lack of preparation.

48. Ask personal questions unrelated to the work, then get offended when boundaries appear.

49. Keep discussing ideas. Avoid making actual decisions.

50. Forget that freelancers are evaluating you too.

So, how did you do? Be honest!

Gaby Rusli is the founder of Counsely, a forum-centric freelance marketplace for the outliers wanting to create, thrive, and empower. Having worked as a client, freelancer, and project manager, she writes about the realities of freelance work, hiring, pricing, and project execution through firsthand experience rather than theory.